Ok, this is actually pretty good.

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Swung on and belted!

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We played for years in a co-ed corporate league in Schaumburg. One year there was a special needs team in the league, but we didn't realize it right away. When the teams were warming up, we really didn't pay attention to the other team.

The game got started, and we knew something was "off" right away. One of our players hit a ball to right, and the right fielder pick up the grounder and proceeded to run it all the way in from right field to the pitcher with an excited grin on his face. We thought it was weird. A few batters later, someone popped up on the ball on the infield, and the pitcher proceeded to the bobble the ball like four separate times until he finally dropped it. Later in the game, someone hit a liner up the middle that literally missed the pitcher's head by inches. We were convinced the pitcher would have been in the hospital if it had hit him. He never saw or reacted to the hit.

That may have been our only win that season.

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Hawaii (fuck) You

Congrats.

I guess the catcher you had two years ago moved to a Dupage County team this year. Little Crest thought he was the best catcher that they faced all year.

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Nice.

My team ended 12-4. Lost in Semis. (who intentionally walks a 10 year old? Lots of people)

Highlight of year was probably beating a travel team that had won 62 of previous 64 games. Their parents were going nuts, coach got tossed, asst coach instructed kids "you didnt lose, the umpire lost"

Good times.

I have accepted a new administrative position on my campus. One more step toward being able to have a second life filled with drugs, prostitutes and more drugs.

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Marty DiBergi: What would you do if you couldn't play music anymore?
M1ck Shrimpton: Well, as long as there's, ya know, sex and drugs, I could do without the rock & roll.

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Good people drink good beer - Hunter S. Thompson

<º)))><

Waiting for the time when I can finally say
That this has all been wonderful, but now I'm on my way

I am a member of the African American alum society at my old school and a donor to the scholarship fund. I bought tickets for a raffle for a white sox sky box. I won. I'm sure there will be no mf'ing me when they post my pictures of the event on the website

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O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.

In.

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You do not talk to me like that! I work too hard to deal with this stuff! I work too hard! I'm an important member of the CSFMB! I drive a Dodge Stratus!

Skybox is cancelled until further notice

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O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.

The second series I'm narrating premiered last night on PBS in the DC/Virginia area. Never imagined I'd get the chance to narrate two shows at once.

the strip club or the game ?

I played three hours of Battlefield last night without being called a racial or homophobic slur.

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Think the strip club is a car wash now.

Nice! The podcasts are pretty good, too. Slooooowly making my way through them.

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I've got big balls
I've got big balls

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Sex isn't dirty, sex isn't a crime. It's a loving act between two or more consenting adults.

-Hank Kingsley

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I just got a $600 Weber grill for $28.

A neighbor ordered a grill from Amazon. They paid a guy to assemble it. When they tried to use it, they noticed that gas was leaking. They called the guy back out & he determined it was defective. They called Amazon who sent them a new grill & told them to keep the "bad" one. They were wheeling it out to their curb to be junked when I was walking by. Got the story and said I'd take it. I spent $28 on a new gas regulator, installed it, and it works like a charm.

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That's killer, Killer.

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Three months later...

Local man and raccoon killed in freak grill explosion. Details at 10.

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Killer V Fest!

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Sex isn't dirty, sex isn't a crime. It's a loving act between two or more consenting adults.

-Hank Kingsley

I got to tell you that may be one of the funniest mults ever

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https://www.backroadspubandgrill.com

0% of you will care about this.

I had a '94 9.9 HP outboard motor which was bought new for $1000. I hadn't run the motor in over a year. It fell over once in my garage and the fiberglass housing was broken leaving a 1 inch diameter hole. The handle was also broke and it needed to be fixed. I nearly threw it away just to get it out of my garage and on a whim I put it on Craigslist with a price of "Best Offer." I was completely honest about everything and said it was being sold "as is." A guy gave me $150 for the motor.

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Lay off that whiskey and let that cocaine be.

I would have given you 200.

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Not so much brag as mentioning. We went long weekend with kids for fun in the West Virginia wilderness. River fun, lake fun, hiking and white water rafting. Class five is sweet. Just a wonderful relaxing time with nature.

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Just realized that all 14 kids on my eldest son's in house team are all on pace to graduate from college within the next two years, or are on baseball scholarships to go for it.

I'm so proud. And happy that those kids have good parent(s)

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There are only two examples of infinity: The universe and human stupidity and I'm not sure about the universe.

I'm one of the few people that know that the song "Mandy" by Barry Manilow was originally named "Brandy" and recorded by Scott English when it was a success in England, however due to the success of the Looking Glass "Brandy (You're A Fine Girl)", industry executives had Barry rebrand the song. Manilow's version is better, IMHO. Homer's is better with "Margie" -- "You came and you found me a turkey, on my vacation away from workie..."

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"All crowds boycotting football games shouldn't care who sings or takes a knee because they aren't watching." - Nas

I'm trying to imagine it sung by Groundskeeper Willie....

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That is awesome.

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My youngest son, who spent 2 years not eating meat, wanted a hot dog with mustard at the Cubs game Saturday.

Then he ate 4 more yesterday at home.

Kind of weird. I think he just liked the idea of getting something from a vendor.

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https://twitter.com/DrKenCast