Lost the afternoon show but landed on his feet at an ad agency in record time.

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The Microsoft ad with Common doing his typical Common inspirational gesticulation shit.

Oh, and the Mastercard one with that 'you can't judge a book by looking at it's cover' song
with SZA and that terrible Mexican band, The Tracks. That singer pisses me off, SZA is fine though.

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Just chillin' like Garret Quillin.

There is a commercial they keep showing on Hulu for Bounty paper towel that states 'Strength Has No Gender!!'. That's cool, I'm all for anyone thinking they can be a hero but the whole point of it is to collect stories of only women being heroes... or Shero as they call it. If strength has no gender, why are they only collecting stories of women heroes and why do you need to re-name the word hero? Hero is already gender neutral...

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Now its neutraler

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

Our gender neutral goes to 11

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Hero.

This commercial will make herstory for its empowerment of womyn.

Fisher Oven-Roasted Nuts

This commercial is wrong on several levels. First, they go on about how the competition's cashews are "fried in oil." Well, guess what...your own fucking cashews are ALSO fried in oil! Just because you have introduced a new "oven-roasted" version doesn't mean you're not also selling the exact same thing that Planters and others are. The competition is not "secretly fried in oil" -- the oil is listed right on their fucking package! (As it is on yours.)

"Never fried...nothing to hide." FUCK YOU.

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OH YES! Fuck this commercial right in its face. I hate this one.

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Just bring back the two Rosies. That was more interesting.

I am increasingly irritated by an Allstate commercial. It is the one where the young Ban Bersteinish kid comes into mother and fathas bedroom to tell him he wrecked the car blah blah blah.

Remind me I want to punch Bernsie.

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BMX is running a spot for a Sir Mix-a-Lot show at the Cubby Bear. It goes "hear hit songs like 'Baby Got Back'!" and I'm waiting for the guy to list more songs I can hear but they never come. He only mentions "Baby Got Back."

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Is your posse on broadway, CH?

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-- source

i came here to post about this one too.... the part that pisses me off is when the whole-foods-shopping-everywoman/protagonist-chick asks the competitors about the ingredients the fat old lady sounding competitor peanut voice says JUST NUTS.... FRIED IN OIL!??! -- repeat that? -- JUST NUTS.... FRIED IN OIL. then they do the fisher's oven roasted thing and the announcer voice comes on like "NO LIES.... NOTHING TO HIDE" --- well who the fuck was hiding anything, even in this commercial? you had the old lady plainly say it twice.... i mean, come the fuck on, the logic doesn't even hold up for 30 seconds in the same goddamn commercial.

honestly i'd prolly go out of my way to avoid fisher oven roasted nuts and look to make sure there's oil listed on any of my future peanut purchases. call it a hunch the competitor disgusting old lady voice would bum me a cigarette if i needed it. ain't that america?

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i remember 102.7 used to have the occasional concert coming up and once they boasted they had the chubbster himself, chubb rock! i don't think they even mentioned his one hit just the two of us.

but hey, for a hefty man like himself with a big ol hit from 91-92 you're just kind of glad he's alive, you know?

but yeah when i heard the same commercial i thought the same thing as you did here... i couldn't even tell you another sir mix-a-lot song and i'm fairly well versed in the art/form.

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McDoink’s Folgers read reminds me of why somebody punched him.

The Hyundai ad with the completely unnecessary falsetto version of Steve Winwood's "Higher Love".
Isn't Winwood's voice high and reedy enough as it is?

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Just chillin' like Garret Quillin.

Can't believe you missed the great followup "Put 'em on the Glass"

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There are only two examples of infinity: The universe and human stupidity and I'm not sure about the universe.

Chubb Rock still alive? Damn. Good for him. I make one Chubb Rock reference per semester....been a while since anyone picked it up, though. Not in this century, actually.

Being a car guy, I've always had a place for "My Hooptie"- Six-nine Buick, Dueces rollin', three hub caps cuz' one got stolen...

It was brought up elsewhere on the board, but there are presently three different corporations running "we lost your confidence, here are all the ways we're going to dupe you into forgetting they ever happened" spots and it is angering, for some reason.

Wells Fargo, Facebook and Uber. Stop apologizing and just don't do stupid, bad shit to make a few extra thousands on your billions.

There's a commercial on the score that starts with "lickity segur financing" and hes weird and I hate it.

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"Play until it hurts, then play until it hurts to not play."
http://soundcloud.com/darkside124 HOF 2013, MM Champion 2014

Hochberg?

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I like the Shirley Ryan AbilityLab commercial that says they'll treat you with all the newest forms of SCIENCE, like biomedical engineering and avatars. I know what they mean, but I still think to myself "my avatars are helping stroke victims? cool!"

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"We shoulda' used a condom but....(smirk) we got distracted..."

They straight up talkin' bout bareback buttfuckin' in prime time.


https://www.ispot.tv/ad/dAb2/gilead-honestly-its-time

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Just chillin' like Garret Quillin.

Are they affiliated with the Marines? They do an "OOH-RAH" at the end of their commercial which I thought was a Marines thing.

https://tribthegame.wordpress.com/2014/ ... -the-face/

This Wendy’s kids meal commercial where the kid and mom talk in a bad godfather impression. Fuck you, I hope Luca Brasi comes to your house and wacks both of youse.

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Not to my knowledge. They just use the theme from Patton because the implication is that they're going to go to war with spinal cord injuries as if they're Patton. It all has a weird written-by-committee feel, because a lot of the copy is obviously written by I-fucking-love-science millennials who have the tic of using the mere word "science" as the ultimate trump card of logic and reason. But it doesn't really work for a hospital, because when they say, like, "we're going to conquer brain injuries with a little thing you may have heard of called SCIENCE," well, you're a hospital, you'd pretty well better use science! Don't they all? I don't think NorthShore uses witchcraft. But how many of said millennials really like the film Patton, count on listeners to recognize it as such, and would also favor comparing spinal-cord rehabilitation to fighting World War II? It's a weird series, but my favorite is still the one where the announcer says "Hey. Stroke" so as to talk shit to a blood clot in the brain, but really just sounds like he's calling the listener a jerkoff.

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Grab your red pen and strike out the word can’t.

Strike out can’t?!? That’s an important fucking word!!! I’m not going to stop saying can’t, even IF they cure every disease.

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"Daddy, why would two men need a condom?"

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