Good morning, everyone. Welcome back.

I’d like you all to review and adhere to the following notes and rules for Season 5 of my talk show.There will be no meetings in my dressing room. No stopping by or popping in. NO ONE. Do not come to my dressing room unless invited. Do not open my dressing room door. IF YOU OPEN MY DOOR, EXPECT TO BE REMOVED. My security team will stop everyone from standing at my door who have the intent to see or speak to me.

I want all the ambushing to stop now. That includes TV staff. You must schedule an appointment. I have been taken advantage of by my lenient policy in the past. This ends now. NO MORE.

Do not approach me while I’m in the makeup chair unless I ask to speak with you directly. Either knock or use the doorbell. I am seeking more free time for me throughout the day. Do not wait in any hallway to speak to me. I hate being ambushed. Please make an appointment. I promise you I will not entertain you in the hallway, and do not attempt to walk with me. If you’re reading this, yes, I mean you.

Everyone, do not take offense to the new way of doing business. It is for the good of my personal life and enjoyment.

Thank you all,

Steve Harvey

For instance they were never taught that Columbus was a slave owner.

I rarely troll.

I am not a legal expert, how many times do I have to say it?

[Fields will] be the starting QB on an NFL roster at the start of next season. Book It!

There will never be an effective vaccine. I'll never get one anyway.

Best host of Family Fued.

Our hotel smelled like dead hooker vagina (before you ask I had gotten a detailed description from beardown)

JORR will claim that it's because he fellated Cheetolini and then brought his minstrel act to the cameras in front of the gilded elevators at Trump Tower (but with all things Trump...he's again wrong )

People hated him when he had his show at WGCI originating here, others from his Kings of Comedy tour thought he was a petty jackass, especially when it was apparent that Bernie Mac got the real love. And I've always thought to be a complete, unfunny fraud.

Nomination seconded.

Weird, I see Dolphin looking in my asshole

Weird, I see Dolphin looking in my asshole

I rarely troll.

Dammit JbIlls you beat me to a similar gif.

Weird, I see Dolphin looking in my asshole

No motherfucking way

Nomination Denied.

My grandmother loves Steve Harvey.

Hmmm...I don't know. I like Richard Dawson enough...hated his whole "kissing schtick". If I had to choose, I'd probably go with Steve Harvey because he is funnier. That said...the questions now on Family Fued are more risque and the set ups for Harvey to be funny and right-there-for-him.

Our hotel smelled like dead hooker vagina (before you ask I had gotten a detailed description from beardown)

For instance they were never taught that Columbus was a slave owner.

Adding to his nomination is that he is firing his entire staff here and moving to LA.

Advocating anyone aside from Richard Dawson as best Family Feud host has significant cognitive impairment and should seriously consider scheduling a time to meet with a neurologist.

where does Louie Anderson rank for you ?

Our hotel smelled like dead hooker vagina (before you ask I had gotten a detailed description from beardown)

Hang him up right next to Ray Combs.

Biden is doing a GOOD job.

Trae Young will be a bust. Book It!

Hang him up right next to Ray Combs.

Advocating anyone aside from Richard Dawson as best Family Feud host has significant cognitive impairment and should seriously consider scheduling a time to meet with a neurologist.

Hang him up right next to Ray Combs.

Congrats on being better than me, Psycory.

I heard recently that he first tried to commit suicide by banging his head repeatedly into a wall. Holy. Shit.

Our hotel smelled like dead hooker vagina (before you ask I had gotten a detailed description from beardown)

Biden is doing a GOOD job.