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 Post subject: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Sat Jul 30, 2016 9:29 pm 
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"A lot of folks who ain't saying ain't, ain't eating."

--Dizzy Dean, broadcaster, on criticism of his diction


From Voices of Baseball: Quotations on the Summer Game, by Bob Chieger

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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Sat Jul 30, 2016 9:34 pm 
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I can remember a sports writer asking me for a quote and I didn't know what a quote was. I thought it was some kind of soft drink.

-Joe DiMaggio

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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Sat Jul 30, 2016 10:12 pm 
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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Sat Jul 30, 2016 10:17 pm 
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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Sat Jul 30, 2016 10:22 pm 
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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Sat Jul 30, 2016 10:24 pm 
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"I can't remember your name, but I know we used to pitch you high and outside."

--Bill Dickey, to a player who asked him if he remembered him (1943)

"I won't be active in the day-to-day operations of the club at all. I can't spread myself so thin. I've got enough headaches with my shipping company."

--George Steinbrenner, after purchasing the Yankees in 1973

"I don't throw the first punch. I throw the second four."

--Billy Martin, 1981

"They used to say, 'If we find a good black player, we'll sign him.' They was lying."

--Cool Papa Bell

"He wants Texas back."

--Tommy Lasorda, on that Fernando Valenzuela was asking for in his 1982 contract

"They shouldn't throw at me. I'm the father of five or six kids."

--Tito Fuentes, SF Giants outfielder

"We was gonna buy you a birthday cake, but we figured you'd drop it."

--Casey Stengel to Marv Throneberry, 1962

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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Sat Jul 30, 2016 10:24 pm 
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I apologai

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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Sat Jul 30, 2016 10:33 pm 
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"I done it for the wife and kiddies."

--Eddie Cicotte, 1920

"The Lord must have known when he made the world round that nothing in it would ever be on the square."

--Eddie Cicotte, 1967

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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Sat Jul 30, 2016 10:42 pm 
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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Sun Jul 31, 2016 8:09 am 
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Tommy Lasorda:

I believe managing is like holding a dove in your hand. If you hold it too tightly you kill it, but if you hold it too loosely, you lose it.

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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Sun Jul 31, 2016 9:18 am 
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“Ain't no sense worryin' about the things you got control over, 'cause if you got control over 'em, ain't no sense worryin'. And ain't no sense worryin' about the things you don't got control over, 'cause if you don't got control over 'em, ain't no sense worryin'.” ― Mickey Rivers

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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Sun Jul 31, 2016 10:21 am 
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"Bill Dickey is learning me to catch real good."

--Yogi

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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Sun Jul 31, 2016 10:31 am 
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The Spaceman :D Do they leave it (Fenway's Green Monster) there during the game?"

"Hell, if KY jelly went off the market, the whole California Angels pitching staff would be out of baseball."

"If it had been me out there, I'd had bitten him his ear off. I'd have Van Gogh'ed him." Source: Five Seasons (Roger Angell)

"I'm mad at Hank (Aaron) for deciding to play one more season. I threw him his last home run and thought I'd be remembered forever. Now, I'll have to throw him another."

"I think about the cosmic snowball theory. A few million years from now the sun will burn out and lose its gravitational pull. The earth will turn into a giant snowball and be hurled through space. When that happens it won't matter if I get this guy out."

"I would change policy, bring back natural grass and nickel beer. Baseball is the belly-button of our society. Straighten out baseball, and you straighten out the rest of the world." Source: Los Angeles Times (February 3, 1977)

"Kids don't learn the fundamentals of baseball at the games anymore."

"Most of the managers are lifetime .220 hitters. For years pitchers have been getting these managers out 75% of the time and that's why they don't like us."

"People are too hung up on winning. I can get off on a really good helmet throw." Source: The Baseball Card Engagement Book (1990)

"That was real baseball. We weren't playing for money. They gave us Mickey Mouse watches that ran backwards."

"The designated gerbil (nickname given to Don Zimmer by Spaceman Lee)."

"The more self-centered and egotistical a guy is, the better ballplayer he's going to be."

"The only rule I got is if you slide, get up." Source: USA Today (October 25, 1989)

"The other day they asked me about mandatory drug testing. I said I believed in drug testing a long time ago. All through the sixties I tested everything."

"There's nothing in the world like the fatalism of the Red Sox fans, which has been bred into them for generations by that little green ballpark, and the wall, and by a team that keeps trying to win by hitting everything out of sight and just out-bombarding everyone else in the league. All this makes Boston fans a little crazy and I'm sorry for them." Source: Late Innings (Roger Angell)

"You have two hemispheres in your brain - a left and a right side. The left side controls the right side of your body and right controls the left half. It's a fact. Therefore, left-handers are the only people in their right minds." Source: Sports Illustrated (April 7, 1980)

"You should enter a ballpark the way you enter a church."

"You take a team with twenty-five assholes and I'll show you a pennant. I'll show you the New York Yankees."

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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Sun Jul 31, 2016 10:36 am 
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Fuck those fuckin' fans who come out here and say they're Cub fans that are supposed to be behind you, rippin' every fuckin' thing you do. I'll tell you one fuckin' thing, I hope we get fuckin' hotter than shit, just to stuff it up them 3,000 fuckin' people that show up every fuckin' day, because if they're the real Chicago fuckin' fans, they can kiss my fuckin' ass right downtown and PRINT IT.

They're really, really behind you around here...my fuckin' ass. What the fuck am I supposed to do, go out there and let my fuckin' players get destroyed every day and be quiet about it? For the fuckin' nickel-dime people who turn up? The motherfuckers don't even work. That's why they're out at the fuckin' game. They oughta go out and get a fuckin' job and find out what it's like to go out and earn a fuckin' living. Eighty-five percent of the fuckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A fuckin' playground for the cocksuckers. Rip them motherfuckers. Rip them fuckin' cocksuckers like the fuckin' players. We got guys bustin' their fuckin' ass, and them fuckin' people boo. And that's the Cubs? My fuckin' ass. They talk about the great fuckin' support the players get around here. I haven't see it this fuckin' year. Everybody associated with this organization have been winners their whole fuckin' life. Everybody. And the credit is not given in that respect.

Alright, they don't show because we're 5 and 14...and unfortunately, that's the criteria of them dumb fifteen motherfuckin' percent that come out to day baseball. The other eighty-five percent are earning a living. I tell you, it'll take more than a 5 and 12 or 5 and 14 to destroy the makeup of this club. I guarantee you that. There's some fuckin' pros out there that wanna win. But you're stuck in a fuckin' stigma of the fuckin' Dodgers and the Phillies and the Cardinals an all that cheap sh*t. It's unbelievable. It really is. It's a disheartening fuckin' situation that we're in right now. Anybody who was associated with the Cub organization four or five years ago that came back and sees the multitude of progress that's been made will understand that if they're baseball people, that 5 and 14 doesn't negate all that work. We got 143 fuckin' games left.

What I'm tryin' to say is don't rip them fuckin' guys out there. Rip me. If you wanna rip somebody, rip my fuckin' ass. But don't rip them fuckin' guys 'cause they're givin' everything they can give. And right now they're tryin' to do more than God gave 'em, and that's why we make the simple mistakes. That's exactly why.


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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Sun Jul 31, 2016 11:01 pm 
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Walt Williams Neck wrote:

"The designated gerbil (nickname given to Don Zimmer by Spaceman Lee)."


Never heard that one before! Classic from # 337.

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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Tue Oct 25, 2016 6:08 pm 
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"One time Cool Papa Bell hit a line drive right past my ear. I turned around and saw the ball hit his ass sliding into second." --Satchel Paige

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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Tue Oct 25, 2016 6:12 pm 
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"Sure."

- Ray Donovan

Respectfully fixed.

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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Tue Oct 25, 2016 6:31 pm 
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Announcer: Manger's Corner on WBAL in Baltimore. Now, the Manager's Corner, with the thoughts and opinions of the American League's winningest manager, the Orioles' Earl Weaver. And now, to the Manager's Corner, with Earl Weaver.

Host: Bill Whitehouse, Earl, from, uh, Frederick, Maryland, wants to know why you and the Orioles don't go out and get some more team speed?

Weaver: Team speed? For Christ sake. You get fucking god dammed little fleas on the fucking bases, getting picked off trying to steal, getting thrown out, taking runs away from you. You get them big cock suckers that can hit the fucking ball out of the ball park, and you can't make any god damned mistakes.

Host: (chuckling) Well, certainly this show is going to go down in history, Earl. Terry Elliot of Washington, D.C. why, wants to know why you don't use Terry Crowley as a designated hitter all the time?
Weaver: Well, Terry, Terry Crowley's lucky he's in fucking baseball for Christ sake. He was released by the Cincinnati Reds, he was released by the fucking god dammed Atlanta Braves. We saw that Terry Crowley could sit on his fucking ass for eight innings and enjoy watching the baseball game just like any other fan, and has the ability to get up there and break one open in the fucking ninth. So if this cocksucker would mind his own business and let me manage the fucking team we'd be a lot better off.

Note: Weaver was apparently an avid tomato gardener, which helps explain this next bit. In fact, Weaver even grew tomato plants behind the stands near the foul pole at the Oriole's ballpark. Its rumored that after a series where Baltimore hosted the Yankees, Yankee manager Billy Martin poisoned Weaver's tomato plants. Regardless of what happened to the tomato plants, their loss prompted another tirade from Weaver, about which, unfortunately, I've been unable to uncover any details.

Announcer: Well, certainly you've made your opinions known on the fans questions about baseball, Earl, but lets get to something else. Alice Sweet from Norfolk wants to know the best time to (laughing) put in a tomato plant.

Weaver: Alice Sweet ought to be worried about where the fuck her next lay is coming from, rather than where her next god dammed tomato plant's coming from. If she'd get her ass out of the fucking bars at night and go hustling around the god dammed streets she might get a prick stuck into her once in a while. I don't understand where these questions are coming from, Tom. That's about it for Manager's Corner, go fuck yourself and to fuck with your show coming up next on the Baltimore Orioles baseball fucking network!


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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Tue Oct 25, 2016 8:55 pm 
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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 7:46 am 
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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 8:02 am 
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Vin Scully


Only if he gets "run support".

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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 8:15 am 
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Matches Malone wrote:
Announcer: Manger's Corner on WBAL in Baltimore. Now, the Manager's Corner, with the thoughts and opinions of the American League's winningest manager, the Orioles' Earl Weaver. And now, to the Manager's Corner, with Earl Weaver.

Host: Bill Whitehouse, Earl, from, uh, Frederick, Maryland, wants to know why you and the Orioles don't go out and get some more team speed?

Weaver: Team speed? For Christ sake. You get fucking god dammed little fleas on the fucking bases, getting picked off trying to steal, getting thrown out, taking runs away from you. You get them big cock suckers that can hit the fucking ball out of the ball park, and you can't make any god damned mistakes.

Host: (chuckling) Well, certainly this show is going to go down in history, Earl. Terry Elliot of Washington, D.C. why, wants to know why you don't use Terry Crowley as a designated hitter all the time?
Weaver: Well, Terry, Terry Crowley's lucky he's in fucking baseball for Christ sake. He was released by the Cincinnati Reds, he was released by the fucking god dammed Atlanta Braves. We saw that Terry Crowley could sit on his fucking ass for eight innings and enjoy watching the baseball game just like any other fan, and has the ability to get up there and break one open in the fucking ninth. So if this cocksucker would mind his own business and let me manage the fucking team we'd be a lot better off.

Note: Weaver was apparently an avid tomato gardener, which helps explain this next bit. In fact, Weaver even grew tomato plants behind the stands near the foul pole at the Oriole's ballpark. Its rumored that after a series where Baltimore hosted the Yankees, Yankee manager Billy Martin poisoned Weaver's tomato plants. Regardless of what happened to the tomato plants, their loss prompted another tirade from Weaver, about which, unfortunately, I've been unable to uncover any details.

Announcer: Well, certainly you've made your opinions known on the fans questions about baseball, Earl, but lets get to something else. Alice Sweet from Norfolk wants to know the best time to (laughing) put in a tomato plant.

Weaver: Alice Sweet ought to be worried about where the fuck her next lay is coming from, rather than where her next god dammed tomato plant's coming from. If she'd get her ass out of the fucking bars at night and go hustling around the god dammed streets she might get a prick stuck into her once in a while. I don't understand where these questions are coming from, Tom. That's about it for Manager's Corner, go fuck yourself and to fuck with your show coming up next on the Baltimore Orioles baseball fucking network!

:lol: :lol: :lol:

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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 8:19 am 
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"You spend a good piece of your life gripping a baseball, and in the end it turns out that it was the other way around all the time." --Jim Bouton

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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 8:19 am 
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Matches Malone wrote:
Announcer: Manger's Corner on WBAL in Baltimore. Now, the Manager's Corner, with the thoughts and opinions of the American League's winningest manager, the Orioles' Earl Weaver. And now, to the Manager's Corner, with Earl Weaver.

Host: Bill Whitehouse, Earl, from, uh, Frederick, Maryland, wants to know why you and the Orioles don't go out and get some more team speed?

Weaver: Team speed? For Christ sake. You get fucking god dammed little fleas on the fucking bases, getting picked off trying to steal, getting thrown out, taking runs away from you. You get them big cock suckers that can hit the fucking ball out of the ball park, and you can't make any god damned mistakes.

Host: (chuckling) Well, certainly this show is going to go down in history, Earl. Terry Elliot of Washington, D.C. why, wants to know why you don't use Terry Crowley as a designated hitter all the time?
Weaver: Well, Terry, Terry Crowley's lucky he's in fucking baseball for Christ sake. He was released by the Cincinnati Reds, he was released by the fucking god dammed Atlanta Braves. We saw that Terry Crowley could sit on his fucking ass for eight innings and enjoy watching the baseball game just like any other fan, and has the ability to get up there and break one open in the fucking ninth. So if this cocksucker would mind his own business and let me manage the fucking team we'd be a lot better off.

Note: Weaver was apparently an avid tomato gardener, which helps explain this next bit. In fact, Weaver even grew tomato plants behind the stands near the foul pole at the Oriole's ballpark. Its rumored that after a series where Baltimore hosted the Yankees, Yankee manager Billy Martin poisoned Weaver's tomato plants. Regardless of what happened to the tomato plants, their loss prompted another tirade from Weaver, about which, unfortunately, I've been unable to uncover any details.

Announcer: Well, certainly you've made your opinions known on the fans questions about baseball, Earl, but lets get to something else. Alice Sweet from Norfolk wants to know the best time to (laughing) put in a tomato plant.

Weaver: Alice Sweet ought to be worried about where the fuck her next lay is coming from, rather than where her next god dammed tomato plant's coming from. If she'd get her ass out of the fucking bars at night and go hustling around the god dammed streets she might get a prick stuck into her once in a while. I don't understand where these questions are coming from, Tom. That's about it for Manager's Corner, go fuck yourself and to fuck with your show coming up next on the Baltimore Orioles baseball fucking network!


I love referencing this at work. A coworker will say something like "Hey, did you hear from Caroline about so and so's audit?" I'll respond with "Carolin needs to worry where the fuck her next lay is coming from!"

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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 8:35 am 
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redskingreg wrote:
Matches Malone wrote:
Announcer: Manger's Corner on WBAL in Baltimore. Now, the Manager's Corner, with the thoughts and opinions of the American League's winningest manager, the Orioles' Earl Weaver. And now, to the Manager's Corner, with Earl Weaver.

Host: Bill Whitehouse, Earl, from, uh, Frederick, Maryland, wants to know why you and the Orioles don't go out and get some more team speed?

Weaver: Team speed? For Christ sake. You get fucking god dammed little fleas on the fucking bases, getting picked off trying to steal, getting thrown out, taking runs away from you. You get them big cock suckers that can hit the fucking ball out of the ball park, and you can't make any god damned mistakes.

Host: (chuckling) Well, certainly this show is going to go down in history, Earl. Terry Elliot of Washington, D.C. why, wants to know why you don't use Terry Crowley as a designated hitter all the time?
Weaver: Well, Terry, Terry Crowley's lucky he's in fucking baseball for Christ sake. He was released by the Cincinnati Reds, he was released by the fucking god dammed Atlanta Braves. We saw that Terry Crowley could sit on his fucking ass for eight innings and enjoy watching the baseball game just like any other fan, and has the ability to get up there and break one open in the fucking ninth. So if this cocksucker would mind his own business and let me manage the fucking team we'd be a lot better off.

Note: Weaver was apparently an avid tomato gardener, which helps explain this next bit. In fact, Weaver even grew tomato plants behind the stands near the foul pole at the Oriole's ballpark. Its rumored that after a series where Baltimore hosted the Yankees, Yankee manager Billy Martin poisoned Weaver's tomato plants. Regardless of what happened to the tomato plants, their loss prompted another tirade from Weaver, about which, unfortunately, I've been unable to uncover any details.

Announcer: Well, certainly you've made your opinions known on the fans questions about baseball, Earl, but lets get to something else. Alice Sweet from Norfolk wants to know the best time to (laughing) put in a tomato plant.

Weaver: Alice Sweet ought to be worried about where the fuck her next lay is coming from, rather than where her next god dammed tomato plant's coming from. If she'd get her ass out of the fucking bars at night and go hustling around the god dammed streets she might get a prick stuck into her once in a while. I don't understand where these questions are coming from, Tom. That's about it for Manager's Corner, go fuck yourself and to fuck with your show coming up next on the Baltimore Orioles baseball fucking network!


I love referencing this at work. A coworker will say something like "Hey, did you hear from Caroline about so and so's audit?" I'll respond with "Carolin needs to worry where the fuck her next lay is coming from!"

A better rant than Elia's.....it's equal, at least.

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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Wed Oct 26, 2016 8:51 am 
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"I was meanin' to say foul and I was sayin' fair. Lou was

sayin' fair and we was both sayin' fair. The umpires were sayin' OK, I guess,

and they left it fair. That's what happened. I mean, instead of sayin' foul, I

was sayin' fair. I meant to say foul, but I wasn't sayin' foul. Maybe I was

thinkin' about Robin (Ventura's ball) earlier when he thought it was foul and

it was fair. So, it was like one of those who's-on-first-what's-on-second

situations there. Again, I'm thinkin' I'm sayin' foul but I'm actually sayin'

fair. Lou's sayin' fair, so it's like OK ... it's fair. Three outs. I was

meanin' to say foul. But you know what? I don't know if it was fair or foul, to

be honest with you. We didn't have an angle."

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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Sat May 18, 2019 9:24 pm 
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Some good ones from Lefty Gomez:

"A lot of things run through your head when you're going in to relieve in a tight spot. One of them was, 'Should I spike myself?'"

"He (Jimmie Foxx) has muscles in his hair."

"Hell, Lou (Gehrig) it took fifteen years to get you out of a game. Sometimes I'm out in fifteen minutes."

"I'd rather be lucky than good."

"I'm throwing as hard as I ever did, but the ball is just not getting there as fast."

"I talked to the ball a lot of times in my career. I yelled, "Go foul. Go foul."

"I've got a new invention. It's a revolving bowl for tired goldfish."

"I want to thank all my teammates who scored so many runs and Joe DiMaggio, who ran down so many of my mistakes."

"I was the worst hitter ever. I never even broke a bat until last year when I was backing out of the garage."

"No one hit home runs the way Babe (Ruth) did. They were something special. They were like homing pigeons. The ball would leave the bat, pause briefly, suddenly gain its bearings, then take off for the stands."

"One rule I had was make your best pitch and back up third base. That relay might get away and you've got another shot at him."

"The secret of my success was clean living and a fast outfield."

"When Neil Armstong first set foot on the moon, he and all the space scientists were puzzled by an unidentifiable white object. I knew immediately what it was. That was a home run ball hit off me in 1933 by Jimmie Foxx."


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 Post subject: Re: Baseball Quotes
PostPosted: Sat May 18, 2019 9:46 pm 
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