I'm planning on doing Matt Nagy for Halloween this year and I really want to drive home the awful playcalling with a parody play card.

Throw ideas here for some "plays" or commentary that can be added to it to really drive home the ineptitude

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“When I walked in this morning, and saw the flag was at half mast, I thought 'alright another bureaucrat ate it.'" - Ron Swanson

You definitely have the idiot part down

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"He is a loathsome, offensive brute
--yet I can't look away."

Instead of "Be You" put "P U" on the card

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O judgment! Thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason.

have a page on the clipboard that is a 1 vs 1 tic-tac-toe game that ends in scratch

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'Your AT&T Universal Card has arrived'? Oh God, Kick-fucking-ass, I got a Master Card! I don't believe it, man. Life is kinda cool sometimes.

You should have one of those puppet heads that you attach to your head with Pace as the puppet to show their collaborative effort.

That's where he'll be in a few weeks if this continues

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“When I walked in this morning, and saw the flag was at half mast, I thought 'alright another bureaucrat ate it.'" - Ron Swanson

Tell everyone you got your play call sheet from WISH. Thought you were getting the KC offense sheet and ended up with this pile of crap.

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Carry a VHS cassette so you can "look at the film" to find out what went wrong.

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"we have to look into the why. until we can figure out why certain events are happening, we cant formulate a path to success. Once we figure out the why, we will proceed to comtaplate the how, but again, im not going to get into those details because i have no fucking idea what im doing"

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the world will always the world. your entire existence is defined by your response.